So, it's hard to put on mascara while you're crying...

My grandpa passed away suddenly last night.  Actually, it was early this morning, sometime after 1am.  My mom called at 2:33 to let me know his heart had essentially given out.  I think I understand why....he gave a lot of it away. He was a very loving man....my brain keeps taking me back to being about 10 years old, staying at their house and scared of the dark, and him singing me to sleep.....

So, today stinks.  I am tired and numb, but have been greatly comforted.  I spent time with my Abba last night, He came and got me, when I couldn't sleep and couldn't talk and was nothing, He sought me out,  He comforted me, and gave me His peace......He is good.

This morning I realized this next week will be crazy and everything's up in the air.  I checked my phone and by the time I was done contacting my closest friends, my community, my girls, I had contacted about 30 people.....I am overwhelmed.  None of them knew my grandpa....but they love me, so they love him too.  I know have at least 30 sets of ears to hear and shoulders ready to sop up my blubbering, when this all finally hits.  I am overwhelmed and grateful.  I am in pain, but I know I am not alone, and that's my hope. 

I didn't start this blog for this purpose.  But if I'm going to be about "bugs in salads" type conversation I'd better be willing to go for the hard stuff. 

My mascara looks terrible.....

I miss my grandpa.....